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Despite the fact that everyone in the venue could do with a feed, the stand-off surrounding the last remaining party pie put on by the management of the Lord Kidman Hotel continues.
The patrons, made up by roughly 30 men and women from the local area, are all too proud to eat the now lukewarm miniature pastry.
The concept of complimentary pub party pies is a common cultural trait most popular along the Australian eastern seaboard, and has been for many years.
The Lord Kidman has today decided that – due to the fact that no one has booked any space in the place for Christmas parties, and that most of the regulars will be scarce over the next week – it’s time for a special gift.
Topless 19-year-old North English backpackers pretending to be waitresses.
And the party pies.
Originally starting as a pokies room marketing ploy, the party pies eventually made their way to the main bar, usually around happy hour while the kitchen is being warmed up.
Meanwhile, the complimentary VIP gaming lounge snacks eventually evolved into less heavy, higher-sugar products like lamingtons and fantales, so as to not tire out the habitual gambling addicts with a post meal slumber.
While Western Australia enjoys similar cultural practices, it is more common that their pubs offer Afrikaans biltong and droewors dried meats instead of party pies and sausage rolls.
However, in central Betoota’s Lord Kidman Hotel today, a recurring scenario is playing out. The last party pie is sitting on the bar near the TAB and no one is willing to eat it.
“It could have been there for like an hour” says Darcy, 55, Ex-Government computer sales.
“Fuck that. I’d rather rip into a piping hot pie and lose the little layer of skin behind my front two teeth before I eat a cold one. I don’t care if it’s free”
While most high-vis heavy suburban taverns often have topless waitresses to clean up the left over plates, The Lord Kidman is far above that kind of uncouth behaviour.
It is not known when tonight’s manager, Graham, is going to have time to put away the rest of the springys and last pie, as is usually the case.
