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As Scotty From Marketing continues to poll worse than Harold Holt at the height of the Portsea rescue effort, the only punch that seems to be landing on his Federal Opposition is the overreaching Sky News allegations that senior ALP members have effectively conspired to murder their own colleagues.

While everyday Australians struggle to figure out why they should care that politicians they have never heard of occasionally clash over ideologies while debating legislation in the Federal upper house, both the Morrison Government and their media allies continue to act like Penny Wong has been forcing her colleagues to play Russian roulette with a live round in the chamber of a seven shot Colt action revolver.

Parliament’s ‘mean girls’ saga has surprisingly made more front pages on the Murdoch mastheads than any of the catastrophic natural disasters or bungled public health roll-outs that have plagued the government throughout their embattled last term.

However, it seems the factional warfare might actually be quite real, as jilted ghosts of Victoria’s Labor Right feed the rumours that their own party is responsible for the invention of this horrible phenomena known as workplace bullying.

Unfortunately for the Morrison government, it seems this news story appears to be the epitome ‘Canberra Bubble’ issue.

But that doesn’t mean the media hysteria hasn’t convinced the Quiet Australians that the Labor Party is toxic – something that anyone in Queensland shouldn’t really need to be convinced of.

One everyday swing voter that has been greatly influenced by this bizarre media bombshell surrounding a rocky working relationship between ALP senators, is Betoota bike shop manger Kevvy Lockyer (56).

“I just don’t know what to think anymore”

“I know Scott Morrison struggles with the most basic tasks, like ordering enough vaccines and RAT tests, or rolling out urgent disaster recovery”

“…But this other mob. They are out of control”

As Kevvy goes on to explain, his vote was completely up in the air just a week ago. Before he learnt that some of Labor’s upper house representatives may have said some nasty things to each other 18 months ago.

“All this news about complicated and testy personality clashes between Labor’s high-functioning female senators at the highest level of Australian politics… It’s got me very nervous about their ability to lead”

“Frosty comments between women is a cancer on our democracy!”

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