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A blatant example of roadside selfishness has gone unpunished today, as a Betoota Grove-based EV driver takes advantage of the brief window in Australian history where the only other people driving EV vehicles are soft cocks.

Dennis Denton (45) used to own a Holden Commodore in the 2000s. Because of this, he has an engrained skillset that helps him navigate hostilities on the road.

But now he’s an electric vehicle owner, and is well aware that the people in this sub-category of motorists are in no way prepared for confrontation.

With school holidays over, Australia’s EV motorists are taking advantage of some brief respite for the newest source of road rage: delays when charging their electric cars.

Queues at some charging stations in the week after Christmas saw drivers forced to wait up to 90 minutes to get back on the road, with some drivers just flat out leaving their cars on the chargers and walking into town for a coffee.

Last year, the Electric Vehicle Council estimated that there were approximately 130,000 EVs on Australia’s roads in 2023 – with predictions that the fleet should reach close to 180,000 by 2024.

With the roads of regional and outer-metropolitan Australia still well under the tight grip of the fossil fuels sector, the roll-out of EV infrastructure is still struggling with blaring black spots – leaving swathes of drivers lining to use only one or two council chargers in servo heartlands.

And this is where Dennis finds himself today, as he sits in his car and plays on his phone for the best part of an hour, while a queue of EVs line up behind him at the council charger on Birdsville Development Road.

“Most of them are the resin-jewellery, salmon chinos types” says Dennis, knowing full well that not one of the people behind him will have the balls to get out of their car and give him a move on.

“None of these blokes have been in a blue before. They aren’t going to start here. What, with all the iPhones ready to record”

“The women aren’t even Karens… They’re more the passive aggressive types who only know how to seek vengeance through discreetly donating to the Greens”

“I could spend an afternoon here and nobody will do shit”

Although there is one archetype that Dennis isn’t going to fuck with at the charger.

“Actually some of these posties have gone EV…”

“I’d probably wanna get a move on if I see the red truck pull up”

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