KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACT
A local girl is cursing the concept of bottomless brunches today as she attempts to maintain a social life whilst staying sober.
Stuck on a table of 12 at Siesta Cantina, a Betoota Lakes Mexican restaurant that serves cuisine about as authentic as a box of stand n’ stuff tacos from Woolies, Chelsea Peters (26) is dying for a chance to actually get some food down.
After being invited last minute to make up the numbers for a friend of a friend’s birthday event, Chelsea says never again will she fall victim to the trap of attending a bottomless brunch when she’s off the grog.
“It’s so dumb, they get us all to pay $89 a head for what? A few bowls of corn chips and some margaritas poured from a tap?” Chelsea whined to our reporter.
“I can buy enough groceries to feed me for a week than what they’ve put down on this table.”
Given Chelsea’s spent all year abstaining from alcohol, she’s become a seasoned professional at navigating social events by ordering weird mocktails or just pumping lots of lemon lime bitters.
But struggling to drink enough softies to make her money back, Chelsea’s had to pig out on the sub-par food in the hope she won’t need to buy dinner tonight.
“Mind if I have the last taco?” Chelsea pleaded to those next to her, as she clawed at a lone mound of pork and pineapple sludge sitting precariously on a limp corn chip.
“And does anyone want that last spring roll?”
With a cold bowl of fries attracting flies at the end of the table, Chelsea’s decided she’d just go for the jugular and hoover up whatever carbs she could find.
“Hey girls pass those chips over, does anyone know if we get any churros at the end?”
More to come.
