LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Like any bloke insecure about his need to provide income and protection to his family, Betoota dad Liam Tirk (35) went and bought an alleged guard dog.
With 30,000 years of positive interspecies companionship to go off, Tirk thought that buying the toughest looking mutt he could find would help protect his wife and kids while he’s not there, unless of course it went mental and attacked the kids.
And now with a ‘Beware The Dog’ sign that is accompanied by an actual dog named Beware, Tirk can leave his most precious people at home guilt free, including during those two hours he gets to work early just for some alone time.
Unfortunately, the fabled burglar in the centre of a pretty hot crime wave, claims that Beware didn’t want to rip into his soft stomach flesh but rather wanted a belly rub for themselves and a bit of frisbee if there’s time.
“Honestly, I don’t think he knows he’s a guard dog,” stated at-large criminal mastermind Baden Blaney of 32 Dongelan Street, Betoota Ponds, QLD.
“I ended up chucking a few frisbees for him before I saw the missus calling the police inside so I quickly pretended to throw the frisbee before running away with it. It’s not a particularly nice frisbee but I gotta get away with something.”
“This is all off the record right?”
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