EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
In some disappointing news, Betoota Heights local Jesse Huberman has been found to not only be ridiculously good looking, but also incredibly accomplished and a nice human being.
Standing at a lofty 6’3, with chiselled cheekbones and thick head of hair that shows no signs of recession, Jesse is quite literally the embodiment of ‘tall, dark and handsome’ – which is made all the worse, when you find out he’s also a paediatrician.
Given his incredible luck in the looks and brains department, it would have been all too easy for Jesse to have some kind of personality disorder, especially seeing that extremely attractive people are far more likely to get away with bad behaviour.
But alas, Jesse is also a nice bloke…which weirdly makes people hate him even more.
“As soon as I saw the bloke, I thought ‘who’s this arsehole?’”, says Jesse’s coworker Brian, “but then he ends up being one of the nicest people I’ve ever met.”
“What an arsehole.”
Jesse’s oldest friend Graham also echoes a similar statement, admitting that he sometimes resents Jesse for being so perfect.
“I tried to sniff out some skeletons in the closet, but there’s honestly nothing.”
“Volunteers, visits his nan regularly.”
“Heck he even has cum gutters. You know, v line abs.”
“How the fuck does a paediatrician have time to get those?”
More to come.
