ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Tesla advocate and green lifestyle enjoyer, Banjo Clementé, was recently heard exclaiming “Haha, I love this song!” as ‘Die Yuppie Die’ by the Painters & Dockers blared through his state-of-the-art sound system.
Clementé, who lives in fear that his friends will find out his parents bought the house he’s told everyone he bought all by himself, seemed blissfully unaware of the lyrical content of the 1980s punk anthem, which is a scathing critique of the yuppie culture he embodies.
“It’s just got such a catchy beat,” he said, tapping the steering wheel of his Model Y.
“But I also hate yuppie culture and how pathetic they are trying to keep up with the latest trends.”
Colleagues at Banjo’s mobile-native marketing firm have been buzzing about the incident.
“It’s peak Banjo,” said his coworker, Lisa.
“He probably thinks it’s some feel-good anthem about change. Little does he know, it’s practically a manifesto against everything he stands for. He’s even got his old high school crest on the back window. Banjo’s dad is an oil lobbyist, I’m pretty sure he was the one who got the Bass Strait oilfield expansion over the line with Howard. Paul Stewart [lead singer] would laugh at him.”
The Painters & Dockers, a notorious Australian punk band, were known for their aggressive, anti-establishment lyrics. ‘Die Yuppie Die,’ in particular, was a direct attack on the consumer-driven, materialistic yuppie lifestyle of the 1980s, a lifestyle Banjo’s electric vehicle and newfound love of the Balmain Tigers fit right into.
Despite the song’s harsh message, Banjo remains blissfully ignorant.
“It’s just music,” he shrugged, as he sipped his a $6 coffee.
“I don’t really pay attention to the lyrics. It’s all about the vibe. It’s like the Wiggles.”
His friends find the situation endlessly amusing.
“We were in the car when it came on,” said mate Tom.
“I nearly spat out my kombucha when he said he loved it. We’d only just finished listening to some Kendrick [Lamar] and that song comes on.”
Banjo’s obliviousness has sparked a new trend among his friends, who have begun curating ironic playlists for his rides.
“Next up, we’re thinking ‘Kill the Poor’ by Dead Kennedys,” Tom laughed.
“He’ll probably think it’s about the Salvos.”
More to come.
