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In a move that has local pub-goers both perplexed and financially strained, inner-city pub, the Grandiloquent Hotel has recently rebranded its humble garden salad to ‘radicchio with vinaigrette’ in an effort to justify a steep price hike.
The garden salad, once a no-frills medley of salad leaves, tomatoes, and cucumbers—perfect for balancing a few pints of beer and making a schnitty and chips seem like a balanced meal—now exudes an air of contrived sophistication. Audaciously rebranded with a name that practically demands it be paired with a glass of sauvignon blanc, elevating it from a simple side dish to a high-brow gastronomical affair.
It is reported that other local pubs in the area are getting in on the radicchio trend, tossing the leafy green onto gourmet pizzas and artisan sandwiches. “It’s smooth, crisp with a slight bitterness and a hint of spice,” enthused one chef, who later sheepishly admitted that radicchio is essentially just a fancier type of lettuce.
The reaction from the pub’s patron’s has been less than enthusiastic.
“This is just a pre-packaged leafy mix from Coles! And where the hell are the tomatoes and cucumbers?” one disgruntled diner fumed.
Sources suggest that the Grandiloquent Hotel might soon give the humble bowl of chips a similar makeover, rebranding it as “Hand-Cut Pomme Frites” to justify yet another price increase.
