KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACT
In news overnight, the CQ rescue helicopter was sighted flying over the Ponds last night after a local girl was forced to call in emergency evacuation services.
The story comes after paralegal Amy Walter-White found herself in a rather icky situation, lying next to a clammy bloke who’s about to get dumped into her “I shouldn’t have done that” pile.
After a gruelling week at Blackwood & Sterling Associates, it’s believed that Amy decided to enjoy some after-work bevies and wipe the slate clean with an old fashioned Friday write off.
But after two glasses of rosé and a margarita at Bryan’s Bar in the Betoota CBD, Amy found herself chatting to a guy called “Miles”, a ratish looking boy who often gets confused for being cute because he’s blessed with good height.
Completely captivated by his 6ft4 frame, Amy found herself pretty into the idea of throwing a leg over and scoring herself a root given it had been a few months since her last bit of action.
And before she could say “Have you got the Uber?”, Amy found herself entering an all-boys share house in the Ponds, only to remember why some men shouldn’t date.
After one and a half minutes of the most underwhelming sex she’d ever had, Amy was flawed when her no pants dance partner Miles came back from the shower to offer up a post coitus snack.
“You hungry?” Miles asked, draping a beach towel around his waist as he entered the room.
“Do you want one of these?” he continued, shaking a box of LCM bars in her general direction.
Realising that she was in the company of a fully grown adult that opts for a lunchbox treat after a root, Amy quickly rolled out of bed and began to make tracks.
“Uhhh I’m good, I’ve got an early brunch tomorrow, I better go!”
“Are you sure?” Miles persisted, “I’ve got some Chicken Jumpys if you want something savoury?”
“Anyway it was nice to meet you, reckon I can get your Snapchat?”
No more to come.
