EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
After years of battling with early alarms, 29-year-old Laura Hennessy has finally discovered the ultimate hack for becoming a morning person – getting a urinary tract infection!
Laura, who describes herself as a “night owl by nature” has struggled with waking up before 8 a.m. her entire life.
That is, until this morning, when a sudden, burning sensation and an uncontrollable urge to visit the bathroom transformed her into an early riser overnight.
“I tried everything. Setting alarms across the room, joining a 5 a.m. yoga class—once—but nothing worked.”
“Turns out the secret is getting a UTI!”
The bane of every woman’s existence, UTI’s almost always occur in the early hours of the morning, as the low amount of urine in the bladder makes it easier for bacteria to grow. This leads to an uncontrollable urge to pee, constant discomfort, and if left untreated, a potential kidney infection – and even death, in some cases.
How fun!
“There’s just something so humbling about sitting on a toilet for hours while you wait for the pharmacy to open”, says Laura, “especially if your sharehouse only has one toilet.”
Laura says that even though she was finally able to get up before sunrise, she unfortunately wasn’t able to do a morning yoga class.
“No I was too busy cursing my existence and wondering what those poor Victorian women did before antibiotics.”
“Poor things.”
More to come.
