STACY OAKSHEAF | City News | CONTACT
IT’S ME HI: Yesterday, Jenny Collins successfully wrapped up another hour-long uninterrupted yap session which has been cleverly disguised as an expensive therapy appointment.
Jenny, noticing her friends were growing tired of her lengthy monologues on nights out, decided to take her head noise to a professional setting. “I figured, why not pay someone to listen to me for a change?” she remarked, booking an appointment with Dr. Sigmund, a highly recommended therapist.
Upon entering Dr. Sigmund’s office, Jenny took no time launching into an unbroken stream of consciousness, where no topic was off the cards. She covered everything, from her daddy issues to filling her in on the latest tea from last nights MAFS episode.
“It was liberating,” Jenny gushed. “I talked about myself for an entire hour without anyone interrupting!”
Dr. Sigmund, maintaining a professional demeanour, furiously jotted down the word vomit that was coming out of Jenny’s mouth, nodded and occasionally validating her thoughts and feelings.
“…and I’m going to cut you off here” she abruptly said as soon as the clock ticked over the hour mark. “We can pick up where we left off next week…” she continued while ever so gently escorting her to the clinic’s front door.
Jenny left the session feeling refreshed and unburdened, already planning her next yap session.
“It’s the best money I’ve ever spent,”
More to come.
