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In shocking news, it’s been reported that a local woman is experiencing one of those wholesome organic hangovers after a long night of drinking organic wine—ironically, in a futile attempt to avoid a hangover.
Lina Townsend (27) is no stranger to a weekend hangover but has found that lately, they’ve become much harder to deal with.
While Lina acknowledges that her hangovers have become a major obstacle to actually enjoying her weekends, they’ve never stopped her from indulging in a long night of wine-drinking after a tough week.
This weekend, the 27-year-old decided she may have found the ultimate loophole to avoid a hangover: exclusively drinking organic wine.
“I’m pretty sure I saw somewhere that most of the hangover comes from all the artificial stuff in the wine,” Lina explained.
This morning, Lina has learned that the only thing organic about her wine was the hangover.
Despite her best efforts, Lina woke up feeling as though her head had been stomped on by a biodynamic vineyard tour group.
“I don’t get it—I paid extra for the organic stuff. Shouldn’t that cancel out the hangover?” she groaned, sipping an electrolyte drink.
Determined not to let this setback deter her, Lina is already considering her next experiment: buying those weird anti-hangover pouches they sell at the bottle shop.
