LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact
Recovering gambling addict Peter Paskin (34) has finally found a way to avoid betting ads by taking inspiration from ancient Greek theatre and gouging his eyes out.
With outstanding debts of over $100k, Paskin admits he only took 50% of the punting companies advice when he gambled but did not do so responsibly.
“I realised I had gone to far when I put a couple hundred on the New Zealand Warriors,” stated Paskin, facing the wrong direction as he could not see where our reporters were.
“Betting on that team is like playing Russian roulette but without the one in six chance all your worldly problems will be gone for good.”
After getting the help he needed Paskin stated he was ready to start a punt free life again but found it difficult to watch as televised football is basically gameplay croutons amongst a salad of gambling adverts leafy greens.
“It was at that point I picked up the spoon and just started shovelling my damn eyes out. I’m going to have to listen to the games on AM radio now, that’s how desperate the situation is!”
MORE TO COME.
