EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

A woman who doesn’t give two shits on maintaining a professional work persona has given her coworkers some more juicy gossip today, having come in hot with an announcement about an unfortunate date she had last night.

Tara Tavares [23] is alleged to not only be the youngest coworker at the Betoota Heights insurance agency, but also the only single one – which means her coworkers find a never ending source of amusement and joy in hearing her shenanigans.

Often exaggerating some parts of the stories and adding in some dramatic pauses, Tara knows exactly what part she plays in the office dynamic and is all too happy to give her colleagues the entertainment they so desperately crave – which she does so, by often standing smack bang in the middle of the room, so all eyes are on her.

Letting out her beckoning signal of ‘soooooooo’, Tara quickly had every member of the office doing a full 180 on their office chairs, and giving her their undivided attention.

“I went on a date last night”, Tara had started, pausing as if she hadn’t planned on continuing that thought.

“Oooh how did it go”, asked Brenda [56] , Account Manager, mother of three and the dirtiest person in the office, “was he cute?”

“He was but EUGH, but I don’t know if I should? Anyway before I start that, do you remember Tony? The one whose ‘roommate’ put all those weirdly romantic posts about his birthday?”

They all nod, having remembered speaking to Tara about it three weeks ago and all individually offering their opinions.

“Yeah so it’s his friend! Is it bad if I date in the same friendship circle?”

“I think that’s fine as long as they’re not best friends”, responded Nico [38], Head of Sales.

“Ooh, but he paid for everything and it was not cheap at all. Like $250.”

“Anyway we kissed, but I also looked at his Instagram following and he follows a lot of bikini accounts, is that a red flag?”

“Ohh definitely yes I reckon”, says Anish [33] the IT guy, “BIG RED FLAG.”

More to come.

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