MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT
In a shocking yet entirely predictable turn of events, local stand up paddle boarder and self-proclaimed “adventure enthusiast but can’t really bothered doing anything too difficult” Brad Johnson (29), has been spotted riding his electric skateboard through the city, just weeks after gracing the local surf with his stand-up paddle board.
Sources close to Brad confirm that his collection of attention-seeking gadgets is both extensive and obnoxious.
“Brad’s always got to have the latest gadget,” said his sister, Jenna (33).
“He’s also been really lazy since birth so if you combine something like skateboard but you don’t need to push, or surfboard but you don’t need to paddle or even catch waves, he’s absolutely all in on it.”
Naturally, Brad’s already moved on to scouting his next big purchase.
Word on the street is he’s eyeing a motorized scooter that folds up into a backpack, ideal for avoiding anything resembling effort.
His friends have stopped trying to keep up with his gadget addiction, resigning themselves to the fact that Brad’s idea of adventure is anything that lets him go moderately fast with little effort.
“He calls himself an adrenaline junkie,” laughed Jenna. “But really, he’s just addicted to anything that does the work for him.”
His latest Instagram post? A photo of him casually leaning against his electric skateboard, captioned, “Why walk when you can ride?”
