EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
A teenager looking to cut corners has unfortunately not been able to plagiarise old school assignments off her older sibling, as she’s quickly discovered he’s a bit of a dumb cunt.
Intelligent, but admittedly a little lazy, Aleisha Zimmerman says she just ‘couldn’t be fucked’ writing a 1,200 word assignment on an ancient history emperor of her choosing, but she was sure she would at least get a B plus if she did – even she did bust one out a mere two hours before it was due.
The year eight student says that was when she remembered that her older brother Jamie had done a similar assignment three years ago, with a different history teacher.
Flicking off a text message offering to clean his room in exchange for access to his assignment, which she was sure was still in his Google drive somewhere, Aleisha had been pretty chuffed with herself for avoiding work when she remembered that she was the smart sibling.
“I don’t even know how he passed highschool, Jesus Christ”, she says, having just read an essay that appeared to be fifth grade level, “he spelled ‘Caligula wrong four times.”
“And half the assignment is about him rooting his horse.”
More to come.
