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Mum Doesn’t Understand Why MAFS Can’t Just Pick Six Nice Boys

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Is there other life in the universe? How do bicycles work? Why do TV journalists put on a slightly strained voice when they...

Tasmanians Asked One More Time If They Are Sure They Don’t Want A Multimillion...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT With a state election campaign currently underway, news reading mainlanders have received a timely reminder that Tasmania is in fact real. At the time...

Nation’s Off-Season Girlfriends Thanked For Their Service Ahead Of Round 1

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A hard-working and valued group of Australian women have been recognised today, both for their valiant service and the fact they’re about to...

Crowd At Bob Marley Movie Must Have Swam In The Pool With Their Eyes...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Betoota cinema owner Glen Brooks is one of many cinlicans who has observed a strange new phenomena amongst movie going audiences. In recent years,...

Dad Keeps His Blink 182 Renaissance Alive By Refusing To Come Out Of His...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A taste of 1998 has come to one Betoota house as a celebrating dad has kept his Blink 182 renaissance alive by refusing...

Mate Who Works From Home Reckons He’s Got An Early Start Tomorrow

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTThe absolute nerve of this cunt has been observed in the quiet suburbs of Betoota as from-home worker Oliver Corton (34) reckons he’s...

Cost-Of-Living Crisis: Cocaine Now So Expensive That Influencers Are Resorting To Paying For It

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTYoung people are feeling another economic blow as cocaine is now so expensive that local and domestic influencers have had to resort to...

Group Chat Successfully Organises A Night On The Piss

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTA new saint may soon be canonised after a certified miracle happened in our lucky little outback oasis this week. For the first time...

Tea Industry Celebrates As Another Grog Monster Declares Sobriety

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTT2 might just turn themselves up to T3 as the entire Australian tea industry celebrates as another grog monster publicly declares their sobriety. A...

Reunion Gig Causes Dad To Make Some, Well, Interesting Fashion Choices 

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTA Betoota Heights family is having a good discrete chuckle after dad Jeffrey Drove (52) has gotten himself dressed up for a gig...

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