TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact
Sitting on his couch, sucking back his fifth Pure Blonde and watching his rugby team pump the opposition, Justin Bennet (29) let slip his deepest fantasy.
“Fuck I wish I was out there.”
Justin is currently working a desk job in one of Betoota’s high-rises, however, he was once a star forward for the Betoota Dolphins 2nd grade team – an honour in itself, but unfortunately for Justin, he just didn’t quite have what it took to take his footy to the next level.
The Advocate understands that this feeling of regret, longing and even wonder, is not unique to Justin’s situation. With over 1.3 million people playing the game each year and only approximately 0.02% of them turning it into a career, it’s an almost impossible way to earn a living.
A staggering statistic indeed, especially considering the number of males currently out there vocalising just how talented they are at the game.
Our reporters reached out to the National Bureau of Rugby Data (NBRD) to gain some insight into whether or not this mentality is a nationwide paradox.
“Oh, it absolutely is” confirmed George Braggs, lead analyst at NBRD.
“A lot of the information we have is actually obtained through mobile microphones, so we hear these men talking organically and gain true insights into how they perceive their talents”
“If we were to make a team out of these men’s perceptions of themselves I guarantee we would make even the most elite teams look like the Betoota Jets – and that’s saying something!” He chuckled to himself.
An unfortunate and stark reality for men across the country, perhaps they are at least entitled to their Thursday to Sunday football fantasies.
More to come.
