CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

It’s very rare in a state election that the average voter will be able find a political party that speaks to their exact needs.

However, that was not the case in the central west NSW pre-polling booths today.

Local shooter, fisher and farmer – Ned Coughlan (51) was blown away when he pulled up to take part in democracy this morning.

With a gun safe, fishing rods and powder-coated post driver sitting in the tray of his ute, Ned is familiar with the feeling of being ignored by the political system. Even the Quiet Australians get more air time than he does.

With a National Party embroiled in very inner-city scandals, the apparent ‘defenders of the bush’ haven’t really been doing it for him lately.

“I dunno mate.” Ned tells our reporters.

“I’m a shooter, fisher and a farmer!”

“I’m not a coal miner or a religious zealot. I’ve got needs that the National Party aren’t interested in”

“All I want to do is shoot, fish and farm. It’s literally all I care about. I just need healthy waterways, I need access to efficient firearm licensing and I need less red tape around vegetation laws. Those are the three things I care about”

“and all I’m getting from the major parties is an obsession with the multinational resource corporations and religious freedoms”

As Ned points out, he isn’t that interested in driving a dump truck in circles down a giant open cut mine on night shift. And he also doesn’t care about women having too many freedoms.

“Stop talking about fucking jobs in the bush. None of the blokes that work in these fucking mines are even from the bush.”

“Also I could not give a fuck about anti-abortion laws. I’ve been married for 30 years and have 5 kids. But if someone doesn’t want to have 5 kids, then they should have the right not to have 5 kids”

However, it seems Ned’s disillusionment with the political system may have been tidied up this morning, after seeing a poster for the NSW Shooters, Fishers and Farmers party.

“Well. There it is” he says

“Sold”

“These people are speaking my language haha fuck yeah”

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here