The Honourable Bob Katter III has today had to deliver swift Mt Isa punishment to Australia’s reaganist political class outside parliament in Canberra, in protest of the discontinuation of the iconic Australian car Holden.
The Member for Kennedy held up a scythe while waving signs that read “Free Market = Aust’s car crash” and “Holden on to Aussie jobs” while watching a parade of classic Holden vehicles drive past Parliament House.
Arriving at the protest in a casket, the crowds cheered as Mr Katter sat bolt upright with his eyes rolled back into his head.
Katter than proceeded to climb out of the wooden box to reveal he was dressed head to toe in a grim reaper jacket to the booming sounds of gothic powerballad of ‘Graveyard Symphony’.
“Dead man walking!” shouted one of the protestors.
“He’s alive!!!” shouted another.
Katter then took a megaphone from one of the protestors and made an announcement, where he declared his intention to introduce a motion in the House of Representatives today calling on Australia to support the re-establishment of an Australian car manufacturing industry.
Katter has began barking about how those bloody toffs in the Liberal Party better push for a majority Australian shareholding and an insurance that all cars purchased by the Federal Government are made in Australia.
Unluckily for the Prime Minister, this protest also coincided with Morrison’s commonwealth car arriving at Parliament House.
“There he is!” shouted Katter, in a ghostly tone.
“Mr Prime Minister! Will you promise, right here, today, to save the Australian automative manufacturing industry”
The Prime Minister, obviously under the pump with the whole global pandemic and economic recession stuff, was quick to dismiss Katter.
“Fuck off, Bob” spat the PM.
“I’ve got too much on my plate to be worrying about these fucking whingeing union grubs who thinking building cars in Australia is in anyway economically sustainable”
Mr Katter did not appear to take kindly to these comments, immediately putting the Prime Minister in an arm bar, before flipping him horizontally.
The crowd began to roar as Bob Katter readjusted his bear grip on the now upside down Prime Minister of Australia.
“FINISH HIM!” yelled one out-of-work Holden factory worker.
Katter stood completely still for several seconds, before dropping to his knees.
As the leader of Australia lay motionless, Senator Jaqui Lambie appeared from nowhere and joined into the melee by delivering a people’s elbow to the Prime Minister’s throat.
At time of press, Greens Senator Richard Di Natale was seen sprinting down the lawns of Parliament holding a steel chair. Behind him was Andrew Wilkie MP carrying a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire.
