ERROL PARKER| Editor-at-large | Contact
Larger-than-life Queenslander and mining magnate Clive Palmer is stuck in an olympic-size swimming pool and he’s having difficulty getting out under his own steam.
It’s unknown at this time exactly how the husky latchkey politician got into this mess, but fire crews and emergency crews are working around the clock to free him.
Only a short walk from his Gold Coast mansion, Palmer is said to be stuck in a neighbour’s swimming pool after wandering off unsupervised.
This latest development comes after Palmer spent a large amount of money last putting up bizarre billboards of himself doing very odd things.
Back on the Gold Coast, it’s becoming increasingly apparent to onlookers that the teams tasked with rescuing Palmer aren’t working that hard and have broken for lunch twice today.
This has placed a large amount of stress on the sexagenarian, who has been seen struggling to pull himself up and out of the pool. He’s also paused briefly to jibber at the growing crowd around the poolside.
“Gibberylooojoooneeepawwwwa! Get me out of here!” screamed Palmer. “I will give the man who gets me out of here a million dollars!”
“I will give you things money can’t buy. I will give you access to the most powerful people in this country,”
An ABC journalist was removed from the scene after he threw a small pale of extra virgin olive oil over the Member for Fairfax, causing him to lose his footing and slide down to the deep end.
The SES said they have every intention of invoicing Palmer for a ladder he broke during the first attempt to free him.
More to come.
He might as well start taking advantage of it and start doing walking laps.
a pale pail of virgin olive oil perhaps?