CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
About 16,200 retail stores, 5800 hospitality and 1000 beauty salons and 800 pubs have today re-opened their doors as Melbourne lifts it’s brutal 115-day lockdown.
Restaurants have filled four weeks worth of bookings in a day, and parks are full of socially distanced revellers as excited residents rush to embrace an easing of restrictions, which now allows them to leave the house without any excuse and to travel as far as they like.
Premier Dan Andrews said that was about 180,000 workers returning to work on site, an achievement that every single Victorian should be proud of.
“I want to thank everybody in all of these industries for the very productive way in which they have continued to engage with us,” he said.
However, the city has been urged to remain vigiliant of further outbreaks, with a massive 24,673 people again tested for coronavirus in the past 24 hours – the biggest daily turnout since early August.
However, despite the manic fanfare, the Premier’s own experiences have been dampened today as hundreds of inner-city Twitter users bended social distancing measures to stand alongside their saviour.
“Could ya just scooch a bit guys” said the Premier, as the #IStandWithDan loyalists rushed to the streets to literally stand with Dan.
“I get it…. You support me”
“But like, go and live your lives. You can’t base you entire identity around this particular political discourse”
“You can go now. This is just getting sad”
The Premier’s supporters, who usually do whatever he says and staunchly defend doing so, appear to struggle with his directions to leave the lockdown debate back in August where it belongs”
“What I’m trying to say is…” sighed the Premier.
“Can you fuck off? I’m trying to get a feed”
“Lockdown is over.”
“You can go back to climate striking or whatever it was you were doing before you decided you were going to follow me into battle”
MORE TO COME.
