26 May, 2016. 16:45
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
JUST MONTHS AFTER stating that the Deputy Prime Minister of Australia looked like he was inbred with a tomato, actor Johnny Deep has confirmed that he’s covered the northern wall of his living room with images of Barnaby Joyce.
Yesterday, Mr Joyce said he must’ve gotten inside the 51-year-old’s head and these latest developments all but confirm that.
After the news broke that Depp did indeed have a wall inside his downtown Los Angeles apartment covered floor to ceiling with photographs of Joyce, he released a statement via his management.
“I’m studying him,” said Depp.
“Every crease on his big red face, I even know when he’s missed a few hairs with his razor blade. Every day, I look [shudders] and think about this man,”
“Look at these pictures. There’s even some of him as a little tomato baby. Then there’s a couple of him at his little tomato university [sighs]. One day we will meet face to face, our palms touching and rubbing against themselves like we’re old friends [coughs]. We will smile, I will go in for the hug. But I will whisper in his ear that I… I am inside of him.”
The Advocate reached out for comment from the Joyce camp, however, the Deputy PM is still recovering from an incident earlier this year where he ate an entire schooner glass.
There is a documentary about this kind of thing, titled “Cannes Man”.