TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact
Betoota Heights Year 10 student Sam appears to have grown a set of balls as well as a hankering for beer this Christmas after boldly sneaking a beer out of the Esky while his mum’s back was turned. What Sam was yet to learn though was that Mum was like the three-eyed raven, she could see everything.
“Does he think I came down in the last drop of rain?”
“I’ve seen him fish out every single one of his 4 beers”
“I haven’t stopped him yet because he’ll take some of the heat off his father for once”
According to other family members, it’s good fun seeing little Sam develop a taste for beer at such a young age.
“Hah! He’ll be so pissed soon, I can’t wait”
“We were a bit worried about him, he got sent to an AFL boarding school instead of the Union school we all went to, so we though he might come out preferring a daquiri to a draught”
“Good to see he’s come good, but”
The Advocate then reached out to Cousin Sam to see how he thought his day was going and whether or not he was getting away with his thieving ways.
“Haha mum has no idea!!” he said with the enthusiasm of a minor with a gut full of piss.
“Drinking beer is the best!”
At the time of press, Cousin Sam was standing on a table with what’s left of Christmas lunch, swinging his shirt above his head and exposing his pale, undeveloped and untoned body to his extended family.
More to come.
