LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact
Local smartphone user Karen Strzelecki (35) has learnt the true feeling of regret after setting her phone on silent and not being able to fucking find it.
Wanting to relax in a world free from group chat notifications, Strezlecki set her phone to silent and proceeded to live her life stress-free for a few hours as if she were an Amish milkmaid.
The fruits of her provincial inspired relaxation session were short-lived as Strezlecki could no longer find the device that tethers her to the rest of humanity.
Struggling to find her phone, Strezlecki asked her husband if he was able to call her phone before remembering she had set her phone to silent as if she were some Silicon Valley CEO who needed to get off-grid.
“I’m trying to stay calm,” stated Strezlecki as she pushed a pile of junk off her kitchen counter searching for her phone.
“Where the fuck is it?”
Scanning her living area for her technological miracle that she chose to silence, Strezlecki began to question every other regrettable decision she had made in her life, leading up to her choice to place her phone on silent.
“I can’t find it. Should I have never of gone to Uni? Maybe I should quit my job, God the house is messy. Do I need to get divorced?”
More to come.
