ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The wins keep on rolling for the people of Melbourne today as they enjoy yet another public holiday for the city’s eponymous horse race.
It comes after people all over Melbourne were paid by state and federal governments to stay at home and put their feet up while this whole localised pandemic blew over.
Now that they’re well-rested and relaxed, Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews thought his inner-city constituents needed another break.
The only person in Victoria who probably deserves to have the day off spoke to the media a short time ago in Melbourne.
“I know we can’t really go anywhere, largely because of failures from my government and commonwealth agencies but I fixed it so we don’t need to go there,” he said.
“But this has been a hard year for the people of Melbourne, so rather than just sending people to work because they can’t go to the races, they can just stay at home and punt away their stimulus cheques,”
“It’s pretty sad, isn’t it? All this money going to betting agencies. Your money. Our money. Anyway, you can’t walk past Hugh Bowman, the Torpedo from Dunedoo. My Australian pesos are on him today. Up yours Josh Frydenberg. Fuck you.”
More to come.
