WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
News Corp Columnist and ‘common sense’ defender Miranda Devine has blasted the new film, The Happytime Murders today.
Struggling to find a way to link the plastic bag ban to the ‘controversial’ Safe Schools program, Devine set her sights on the new movie.
In a piece titled “Not Even Kids Are Safe From Being Brainwashed By Communist Propaganda,” Devine attempts to attribute the lewd sexual acts that take place in the new puppet movie to Same-Sex Marriage Legislation.
“The hysterical left know no bounds. It seems as though the will stop at nothing to subordinate people, even children, into following the words of their loony leaders,” she began her piece today.
Seemingly worlds apart, Devine explains that the link between the puppets having sexual intercourse in the new movie and Same-Sex Marriage, is ‘societal decay.’
“Ever since we allowed homosexuals to desecrate the values I hold dear, we have seen a continued slide in societal standards. The puppets, children’s characters, one of the pillars of childhood, having sex on the big screen is just the latest in a long line of cases of cultural leftist vandalism,” she further wrote, before eventually concluding with the unrelated sexual assault of a child in a small regional town.
Devine spoke to us about the longbow she drew today.
“Look I don’t know. I had a bit of a blow out with the girls down at a rosé bar in Mosman yesterday and my brain felt like it was in a vice.”
“I couldn’t really think of anything to be honest, and I gotta churn out an abstract and often unfounded op-ed every day, so what was I to do,” Devine said.
The piece has drawn mixed reviews online, with echo chamber twitter users decrying it like anyone cares about their tweets, while random News Corp commenters named Pete and Darryl have applauded Miranda in the comment section saying things like “Finally! Some common sense!”
More to come.