LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
After waking up from a nightmare where he actually faced consequences for something, Attorney General Christian Porter decided to cheer himself up.
Enjoying another day of approved mental health leave, Paid Leave Porter decided to step outside for some good old-fashioned offline harassment.
While trying to pry a $2 coin off a footpath (forgetting he was the one who glued it there) Porter spied a golden opportunity to boost his spirits in the form of a Perth council contractor doing routine maintenance.
“Earthquake!” yelled Porter, as he grabbed the bottom of a ladder the electrician was standing on the top of and shook it with a ferocity he would certainly be unable to recall later.
“Beware the magnitude handy-boy!”
According to witness reports, the unnamed electrician began screaming for the Attorney General to stop shaking the ladder that separated him from the ground 15 metres below but was drowned out by the sound of Porter’s laughter.
“The poor fellow took out his phone to call for help,” stated one witness, who as Porter’s neighbour has had to replace their letterbox four times this week alone.
“And [Porter] started shaking the ladder even harder.”
It is then believed Porter became bored with toying with the man’s life and knocked the ladder to the ground.
“He then took a photo of the guy and showed it proudly to every person who walked past. He wouldn’t let them leave until they laughed at it.”
