ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Prime Minister Scott Morrison hasn’t let this businesss with the Chinese get him down this Christmas break.
Rather than get his bat out of the way and let the ball go through to the keeper, the Bloke-in-Chief has come up with an idea to keep the home fires burning after the Chinese banned the importation of Australian coal earlier this week.
He said that parents of kids with ADHD, who are notoriously poorly-behaved and respond well to cruel and unusual punishment, should buy local, Australian-made coal this year for their little bastards.
“We all know how much of a handful kids with ADHD can be,” he said.
“Disrupting classes, biting people. You know, there’s one of them in every class. The parents that don’t want to zonk their kids into normality with drugs, they should be buiying their kids Australian coal for Christmas,”
“Yes, it might cost a bit more but Australian coal is the greenest coal in the world. Our thermal coal is cleaner than Christopher Pyne’s conscience. The shit they use to make metal is also great but parents shouldn’t be fooled into buying cheap immitation coal from countries like Indonesia, Rhodesia and any other -esia’s around the world. Australian coal is the best.”
More to come.
