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A gathering of Betoota’s greatest upper-middle-class thinkers has today resulted in an incredibly awkward couple of minutes, after a local Indigenous representative’s cultural ritual of welcoming the guests to the Aboriginal land they were meeting on.
The long-irrelevant campaign activists group StandUp! – who meet in Betoota’s Flight Path District every couple of months to discuss how they can help remove Peter Dutton from the political arena – have never really nailed the post-Welcome-to-Country etiquette.
As is now even acknowledged by the Liberal Party, a welcome to country is a ritual performed at many events held in Australia, intended to highlight the cultural significance of the surrounding area to the local mob. The welcome is best performed by a recognised local elder.
While the woke renegades at StandUp! have progressed beyond just asking any random Aboriginal person to host the welcome to Country, they still don’t really know what to do afterwards.
In fact, since this group of Loud Australians first integrated the ritual into their meetings in 2018, many of their members have lost sleep wondering if they are meant to clap after the conclusion of the local elder’s address.
Last night’s meeting was no different.
As the local Aunty gave an informative speech about local traditions and the history of the local mob both pre and post-white settlement, she explored many different themes – ranging from Aboriginal suffering and dispossession to Aboriginal self-determination and excellence.
Before wrapping up the address, the elder threw in a quick-witted one-liner about overthrowing the conservative faction of the coalition government, a joke she knew would appeal to to the leftist sensibilities of her audience.
It was also a generous attempt at breaking the ice in a room full of white guilt
However, after finishing up with an ‘Always Was, Always Will Be’ – the room full of corporate creatives and semi-retired book club mums had no idea what to do with their hands.
The local elder was met with an excruciatingly awkward half clap, as everyone avoided eye contact.
However, in what somehow came as a relief to the room, the cringe-worthiness of this guarded applause was quickly overshadowed as as a white dreadlocked graphic designer gave aunty a black power salute.
