CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
While February has seen farmers in parts of western Queensland saw their stock drown and die from exposure in disastrous flood conditions which has claimed the lives of over half a million cows, farmers further south from the Tropic of Capricornia are still as dry as Keith Urban’s backstage dressing room.
The Northern floods come after an extended period of drought, when many paddocks across the region were reduced to dust – which were drastically battered by three years of rainfall in 10 days – a national tragedy that eventually got a visit from the Prime Minister after Kerryn Phelps had finished putting him over the barrel with the Medivac bill.
However, there’s still a few farmers crying poor with no rain. Not even 400km from the catastrophic flooding events up north.
It’s a lesser-known plight that opposite leader Bill Shorten has jumped on, in his race to look like more of an ocker than Prime Minister Morrison.
While the Nightwatchman waited until the Northern Queensland graziers had buried most of their dead stock before he visited them, Shorten decided to head down to the state’s South-West to meet with the voters who still haven’t even seen a low-flying commercial aeroplane flight.
However, upon arriving in the township of Mitchell, QLD earlier today – Bill Shorten quickly became skeptical of all these so-called farmers singing the blues about this so-called drought.
A suspicious Shorten was seen crouching in the main street while he inspected the bright green grass on the nature strip.
“So much for a drought” laughed Shorten, as he ran his fingers across the -Artesian-bore-water-irrigated cooch.
“I knew these dumb farmers were telling fibs”
“Things look alright in town, maybe the council is a bit better at managing water than these stupid hillbillies are [haha]”
At time of press Shorten was seen asking the publican of the Court House Hotel if they had any Stone & Wood Pacific Ale.
