INGRID DOULTON | Lady Writer | Contact
“Why don’t you have any shares?”
“Where does all your money go?”
“Don’t you have a plan for the future?”
These are just some of the questions that Margaret Stilton receives occasionally from friends, family and above all, men.
As she approaches 30, some of her friends are investing in real estate, others in crypto.
But the French Quarter yo-pro does have a plan and that plan is proving popular with her contemporaries around town and around the country.
“I don’t invest in the share market because it’s about to go down,” she said.
“I’m smarter than that,”
“On top of that, I don’t have enough to invest in real estate yet. But even then, the market is looking so volatile. You know, I bet there’s a lot of men who read the headline of this article and throw their two cents in the bottom about what me and other women should do with their money,”
“How about I just hoard cash in an offset account and whenever life gets too much, I have a brain snap one night and book a three-month holiday without telling work first? That sounds much more appealing to me than watching my portfolio slowly wither away while some clumsy, chinless ex-private school fuck-up of a financial advisor tries to convince me to pour more money in. Count me out, fellas.”
A study released earlier this week confirms that Ms Stilton’s sentiments are echoed by a number of young women around the country.
The landmark study into the spending habits of young women have found that fewer of them are investing in shares compared to their male counterparts.
Cameron Dooley from the Australian Stock Exchange released their study this morning to mild fanfare and backslaps at the Sydney establishment.
“Women don’t invest in the share market because they’re much smarter than men,” the study said.
“The only way to make money on the share market these days is to have a friend or relative in the industry who gave give you a few inside tips. ASIC only ever goes after the big boys so as long as their isn’t a paper trail of your chats, you should be sweet,”
“And this study has found that women have fewer friends in the industry. Plus, insider trading is incredibly reckless and illegal. Women are generally too smart to get themselves involved in that type of stuff.”
As for her plans for the future, Margaret says she’s going to Europe in September with a few friends and she wouldn’t have it any other way.
“I’m happy,” she said.
“And I don’t care.”
More to come.