Local checkout-countess Jennifer Harcourt (55) claims this generation wouldn’t be so doomed if they put down their iPads and did more reading, referring to her 14-year strong subscription to OK! Magazine.

According to the minion-meme enthusiast, kids need to step away from the screens and learn more about the world they live in, citing the British royal family and what Sophie Monk really thought about Love Island as essential information.

“It’s just common rudeness,” exclaimed Harcourt through a mouth full of chewy.

“Kids are just on them iPad things all the time, don’t even have time to hear the latest gossip from Margo Robbie’s brother!”

Harcourt believes children are not being raised to learn the dangers of technology such as the abundance of unreliable online news sources and should instead turn to the integrity of print publications that accurately reported Brad and Angelina’s breakup seven years before it even happened.

“There is some shit in there though. Diet tips, who the fuck needs those? I only read the miracle diet tips.”\

Bringing up her children with minimal screen-time is a point of pride for Harcourt who chose not to have Pay TV or video games in her home due to not wanting to stunt her childrens development and to save money for a few extra slaps on Queen of the Nile.

“And they’re better for it! My youngest, he could complete the OK crossword when he was just five years old!”

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here